Wow ....

Wow... yeah ok so Im selfish bad tempered and use guilt and anger to get my way.
This all came to light last night after I got ticked off and blew up at DH.
Let me back track a bit here.

The hubby has a friend who lost his wife several years ago. He has no job and says he cant get a job on the books cause he owes the IRS money and they will take all his earnings. So he collects cans metals what ever he can to make money. The hubby was buying him food to help him out ... I got kinda ticked off as we where doing without things. So now said friend comes over once a week mows the yard helps DH do what ever . He eats dinner showers and plays on our computers. Oh I failed to mention his power is cut off no lights no water . He has a wood burner to stay warm in the winter.
Said friend had a 81 Ford pickup and the city has decided since it wasn't tagged that he had x amount of days to move it or it would be towed.
The solution ? We take the pickup..after the hubby spends money on a new fuel pump 30 day tags and insurance. Now it sits in front of our house and hubby keeps saying its your truck your truck. UGGGGGGGGG I don't drive any more people I haven't had a licence in years ! *sigh*. I digress... I went on housework strike and didn't do laundry for a week and dishes for 2 days.
Needless to say we ran out of drinking glasses and clean towels.
I'm not the only adult in this house there is the hubby daughter 26 and son 25.
Son will help once in awhile the daughter is well .... at least she starts work on Monday.
So yesterday I got on my big girl panties and got over my mad. I cleaned the living room made my bed gathered and emptied all the trash and washed dishes. Gathered laundry and even started some.
I fixed a decent dinner even ... Pork Steaks mashed potatoes mushroom gravy and green beans.
Then hubby started in on me about the online game we all play World of Warcraft (WoW). Play if you want ... play if you want ... No I don't want to play because laundry needs done and if I don't do it it wont get done .
Boom that started a fight of course.
I brought up the friend and how the day he comes over used to be the nite we went out for coffee..he countered with we stopped going before this cause of the kids moving back home..you haven't said anything about wanting to go ... ummm yes I have you chose to ignore it.
Hubby: I have asked what I can do to help ...you say nothing .
Damn do I have to tell you that not sticking your socks in your shoes and emptying your pockets and walking your clothes to the hamper everyday ? Do I need to say hey I washed all the dishes how about you put them away ? Or I washed dried and folded the laundry how about you put them away ?
Yes your right I don't want anyone else doing dishes because to me washing dishes is more than just washing dishes ! Wipe the stove and counters too !
Sheesh is that to much to ask ?
So it ended up with him telling me I was selfish and used guilt to get my way , and me telling him he was an ass.
We had a uneasy truce by the time I went to bed .
I wake up this morning to the bedroom light being flipped on and burning my eyes with its glare.
Sorry I said I was turning on the light to cover your eyes ... umm ok . I get up and I hear the washer running. Is the washer running I ask ..yeah I started a load of jeans ..sigh ..ok was going to take a shower then start laundry ..thank you for starting laundry. Get him out the door to work and when the washer is finished I go to put load in the dryer ... ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Not only did he put jeans in he put in the greasy shirt he wore to work on said pickup. The one I had sat aside to wash alone so it wouldn't get on the other clothes. Thankfully none of the jeans had grease on them. So my grumpy mood isn't getting any better.
As I sit here typing this he calls he hasn't even been gone 3 hours and asks how busy I am with stuff . What ?
Don't worry I tell him I will get stuff done .. I know you will .
Yeah I'm not a happy camper and he knows it . PMS might be some of it but damn enough with the crap this family likes to pull stack and leave laying around.
Rant over.

Update

Got everything done on my list minus cleaning the carpet.
Ran out of energy and my back and hip was hurting badly.

I did continue it through tonight.
I washed up dishes from dinner,cleared and wiped the table.
Cleaned up and set up coffee maker.
Ready for tommrows list which will be small as I have the bushi boy and iddy bit

Starting Over

Im fed up with myself and my house!
I find myself doing just enough to get by with the house.
Its gotten so dark and heavy and its time to get it back on track.
Ive let more than the house go lately and now more than ever I need the light and peace in my life and home.
So for how ever long it take Im going to be cleaning and cleansing my home .
New habits are beginning today and will post the plan and end product.
Todays plan:
Shower and dress to barefeet.
Brush teeth and hair facial care.
Put away all the clean dishes.
Gather all dirty dishes
Scrub out kitchen sink
Wash all dirty dishes
Dry and put away clean dishes
Scrub down all counters
Scrub down butcher block
Scrub down all kitchen Cabniets
Take down and wash knick knacks off top of cabniets
Wash up find new homes for knick knacks in kitchen window
Take down and wash kitchen curtains
Clean kitchen window, wipe out window sill
Clean out wipe out fridge
Declutter top of fridge wash cover and replace
Scrub Stove top to bottom
Scrub outside fridge top to bottom
Scrub Backsplashes
Empty kitchen trash
Clean inside and out of kitchen trash can
Vacuum kitchen
Clean kitchen carpet.

Wheww thats alot may take more than a day but will get it done !